8 April 2007
Today I digress from my usual anti-war tirade to another war going on all over the world, domestic violence. I was a volunteer for three years, as an advocate, at a confidential, domestic violence shelter. What an eye opener! Prior to my volunteer job, I was ignorant of the scope of this problem. After three months of specialized training I was ready to help in any way possible, sometimes just listening. The horrors that the women and children that I encountered suffered, just about broke my heart. To live with the kind of fear these women were exposed to day after day, in my mind, makes them heroes, to have been able to break loose from the situation that they were in and seek help.
Some would return to the abuser and some who did return, didn’t live to try to escape again. The profile of an abuser, and they are found in all walks of life, is mainly a pattern of control over all the actions of the person or persons under his control (I say his because only about 3% of abusers are women). We read more and more about men killing women during domestic violence disputes and even about women killing their abusers to end the pain inflicted upon them. I’m really up in the air as to how I feel about therapy for abusers. To me, it doesn’t seem to work. A sad fact is that here in Seattle, about 90% of women seeking help are turned away because of lack of room in shelters and money for hotel vouchers is in short supply. Even though Seattle is a progressive U.S. city, it has one of the highest turn-away rates in the country.
I admire women who are fighting for more funds and shelters for the victims of a hidden war. This little blog, is my bit to help raise awareness of this shameless situation…Joan Lough
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